Automatic Negative Thoughts: Strategies to Stop the Spiral
Have you ever been plagued by a recurrent thought like “I’m never good enough” or “nobody likes me?” In Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, these are called Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs), and we all experience them to some degree. Humans are simply wired to pay more attention to the negative than the positive - after all, it was important for our ancestors to stay vigilant to potential threats. While relatively normal, these thoughts can harm your well-being and functioning when they start to shape your self-esteem, limit your behaviors, or cause you distress. The good news is that ANTs are malleable and can be changed with practice. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy offers many different strategies for challenging these ANTs. In this article, we will suggest some of the best strategies for stopping the spiral of negative thoughts.
Don’t try to stop the thought. The first rule of stopping a thought is not trying to stop a thought. Why? Try this - don’t think about pink elephants. Now there’s a good chance that you’re thinking about a pink elephant. Trying to force a thought down with pure will, or getting mad at yourself for having a negative thought, only gives the thought more strength.
Give it a name. When you notice that you are thinking “nobody here likes me,” for example, add a label onto it: “I am having the thought that nobody likes me.” The simple addition of “I am having a thought that” takes away some of the power of the thought and reminds us that simple thoughts aren’t automatically facts.
Keep a thought diary. Sometimes, the best way to get a thought out of your head is to put it to paper. Keeping a journal of your automatic negative thoughts not only helps clear them from your mind, but it also gives you a record to revisit later, alone or with your therapist.
The friendship test. Would you say your ANT to your best friend? What about the 10-year-old version of yourself? Another way to express this is to ask yourself, what would I say to a friend if they had this thought? If you think that your ANT is too harsh or untrue to say to someone you love, then it’s too harsh and untrue to say to yourself.
Make a pie chart. All ANTs are preceded by some sort of triggering event. For example, let’s say your friend is taking much longer to answer your message than they usually do, and your responding ANT is “they are mad at me.” That’s one explanation for the scenario. What are some others? Maybe they are busy, or had a bad day themselves, or are waiting for a better time to text you back. Now, assign a probability to each explanation. Which is the most likely? You’ll find that ANTs are often the least likely explanation for the triggering situation.
Twist the ANT back on itself. When you’re having the ANT “I am weird and awkward,” trying to tell yourself “I am cool and bright” simply won’t work. Instead, try a neutral affirmation, one that feels true to you. Maybe your affirmation is “even if I am weird and awkward, people have liked and even loved me before” or “My weirdness makes me interesting and unique and a good friend.”
We hope this list gives you some ammunition to bring into your battle with ANTs. This is just a sample of the thought challenging techniques out there - a licensed therapist can teach you strategies that work for you and help you permanently change the way you talk to yourself. Looking for that kind of change? Give us a call at AWC to be matched with an experienced therapist today.
